Kitne Admi Te Topy?

As a lover of the internetz i try to keep up with the internet memes and all. once in a while i try to bring some local context in to it. So i thought of doing a movie/tv macro.  I love those things! And as the police/military mutiny and #mvcoup in the Maldives is the only thing people are talking about these days, i had to post something with that tag! (i wouldve published real posts as i usually do if i were blogging normally. but im not these days.  im just twittering and facebooking instead).  so, considering this and to prove that ive not abandoned this blog altogether yet,  i made a macro of that sort. another reason is the fact that this guy is always awkward in photos. no really. check the news websites.

Topy Thaufeeq just came back from "Gaumee Itthihad Party" recruitment program.

 Now he stand before his boss, Waheedhu...

http://imgur.com/fyjWq 

note: to get this, you will need to understand a lil bit of hindi/urdu, be familiar with local politics of dhivehistan, and have watched the bollywood classic Sholay. 

fake moyameehaa on minivannews

though i havent blogged much the past few months (and years) i have been expressing myself on social networking websites, especially Facebook and Twitter. And recently someone or people have started using my internet alias "moyameehaa" and this blog's url to comment on minivannews.com . I have commented after that guy, stating my real views a few times now.

This guy who i suspect (from what he posts) to be an average local islamist or possibly a wahhabee is using my name to make it look like that i am an Atheist who hates Islam and Muslims.

Not really surprising because in their delusional world where china doesn't matter, USA, UN and EU are all conspiring to take away the "religion" of 3 lakh Islanders in Maldives and always plotting (with the help of Jews ofcourse!) to kill and harm muslims around the world. In this delusion of persecution and the paranoia resulting from it; I have become a member of some imaginary "atheistchristianjewgaylaadheenee alliance" in Maldives that conspire with the ruling MDP to"destroy" Islam. So they want to portray me like that, and is using fake comments to do so.

Not that i have to explain myself to anyone, but I am a Muslim, I Love my country and I am a humanist. I am only against the Islamist Invasion of this country, and the barbarism and human rights violations they carry out in the name of Islam. NOT against Islam or Muslims. I even respect the Wahhabis' and Islamists' right to freedom of conscience, thought and expression even though i disagree with them. I don't HATE, them i just disagree with their interpretation of Islam. I am FOR Islam and Human Rights. And I see no contradiction between these two.

I have requested minivannews to allow commenting through a service like facebook connect or disqus to retain our identities. I applaud Haveeru News for doing that. Their new website and its commenting function is pretty kool.

So from now on, if there is ANY comment with the name "moyameehaa" or anything similar commenting on minivannews or any other site without a commenting service like that...that is NOT ME!

are they enemies or victims of your society?

Ive never done this before. ive never posted a song with lyrics, ever. atleast i think so. anyways, therez nothing much to say about this except stating the obvious fact that bob dylan is a fucking genius poet-musician! Im sharing this coz this is awesome poetry and i believe this is very relevant and relatable in today's Dhivehistan... so here goes...to our totally fucked up society and the failed system. amen!

Ballad Of Donald White

My name is Donald White, you see
I stand before you all
I was judged by you a murderer
And the hangman’s knot must fall
I will die upon the gallows pole
When the moon is shining clear
And these are my final words
That you will ever hear

I left my home in Kansas
When I was very young
I landed in the old Northwest
Seattle, Washington
Although I’d a-traveled many miles
I never made a friend
For I could never get along in life
With people that I met

If I had some education
To give me a decent start
I might have been a doctor or
A master in the arts
But I used my hands for stealing
When I was very young
And they locked me down in jailhouse cells
That’s how my life begun

Oh, the inmates and the prisoners
I found they were my kind
And it was there inside the bars
I found my peace of mind
But the jails they were too crowded
Institutions overflowed
So they turned me loose to walk upon
Life’s hurried tangled road

And there’s danger on the ocean
Where the salt sea waves split high
And there’s danger on the battlefield
Where the shells of bullets fly
And there’s danger in this open world
Where men strive to be free
And for me the greatest danger
Was in society

So I asked them to send me back
To the institution home
But they said they were too crowded
For me they had no room
I got down on my knees and begged
“Oh, please put me away”
But they would not listen to my plea
Or nothing I would say

And so it was on Christmas Eve
In the year of ’59
It was on that night I killed a man
I did not try to hide
The jury found me guilty
And I won’t disagree
For I knew that it would happen
If I wasn’t put away

And I’m glad I’ve had no parents
To care for me or cry
For now they will never know
The horrible death I die
And I’m also glad I’ve had no friends
To see me in disgrace
For they’ll never see that hangman’s hood
Wrap around my face

Farewell unto the old north woods
Of which I used to roam
Farewell unto the crowded bars
Of which’ve been my home
Farewell to all you people
Who think the worst of me
I guess you’ll feel much better when
I’m on that hanging tree

But there’s just one question
Before they kill me dead
I’m wondering just how much
To you I really said
Concerning all the boys that come
Down a road like me
Are they enemies or victims
Of your society?

enough of bra colors, where you like it and brand names : itz time for a smoke!

do i need to explain anymore? i bet uve all seen it on facebook. for those of you who dint notice it, this is about some viral status update thingy..read more from here. right! breast cancer awarenes. :/

any excuse to talk abt sex/relationship status while claiming itz about some sort of cancer awareness campaign. tsk. ive been telling these brand name guys to "Just Do It". but it seems, this is a very human thing. people like double entendres, ambiguous language and...most importantly...to talk about sex and mating. and so, as part of my current (very recent) endeavor to understand and embrace (atleast some of the) fads and crazes of my society (i call it; "giving in to the tunaeffect")... i have decided to actually play this lame...uh.. i mean.. game.

i present you....

smoking against lung cancer - update your status, fight lung cancer!

single = light cigarettes

in love = theyo bidi

unhappy in love = rashu bidi

in a relationship = hard cigarettes

married = dhun gudugudaa

engaged = suttaa

frustrated = hiki dhunfaiy[ganesh/(i)skoal(u)]

out of sex= rolling my own cigarettes

NOTE: *unlike these status updates, there is an ACTUAL social media campaign to beat cancer everywhere>>>For every tweet, Facebook status update, or blog post containing the #beatcancer hashtag, eBay/PayPal and MillerCoors will be donating 1 cent to cancer research. for real? i dunno. u find out. read more abt it!

** everyone knows that smoking tobacco is a risk factor (not a cause, despite what almighty bilal might have told ya) for lung cancer. also, chewing 'hiki dhunfaiy' and snuff AINT SAFE either. as uve noticed, i have included theyobidi/weed in the list...this, however does not (no conclusive evidence yet) have such a connection to cancer. also, it is being used for medical purposes. im just saying.

10 reasons why the world cup is haraam.

The maldivian haabees have dissapointed me. really. :(

smoking is haraam, movies are haraam. music is haraam,secularism and democracy is haraam.tom and jerry and mickey mouse are haraam. travelling without a mahram,showing hair and using perfume are all haraam for women.and the list goes on.

They protest over changes in alchohol regulations, when a muslim converts, about the new curriculum,about diplomatic relations with israel, about something written on the internet..etc. They make facebook groups against their critics, against cocacola, issued death threats against secularists and that one guy who converted from islam for a few hours...etc.

BUT!

But they fail to issue any verdict against the worldcup. they did not protest against it, or even make a goddamned facebook group against it. instead they converted their haabee screens of doom (HSDs) in to worldcup screens, bought TVs for their homes/shops, and started enjoying the matches. you heard it. they are ENJOYING a worldly sport. what the frack is this? something is really wrong here.

im not gonna just sit around when the only passionate and devoted buncha people (you so-called liberals are wussies!) in my country screw up over some lame game. (apologies, football fans. no disrespect. but i dont like football).... so i decided to set aside our differences and help them out. i decided to do it for them and get everything back to normal.for this reason today...today im gonna frigging give a fatwah. oh yeah. brother moyameehaa is gonna give you one really kickass fatwa today. now listen! read!

[taliban militants demonstrating the proper use of a soccer field.]

the world cup is haraam for many reasons. but since 10 is an important and serious number; id give you ten reasons. they are:

1. men displaying their awrah (hedhun laigen oriyaamun, as our beloved mullahs would/should put it). behaving in ways which can provoke sexual desires of women and gay men. immodesty.
   
   
2. supporting kafir nations like the evil america and portugese!?! this is unacceptable. imitating the kuffaar is common during worldcups. wearing their jerseys, flags and copying their hairstyles. then there are the vuvuzelas. obviously it is not really a 'musical' instrument, but it is part of south african kafir culture and made in kafir communist china!
   
   
3. people watching football even when it is prayer time. just like music is haraam for being an 'idle waste of time'. a friend told me there were only two rows in their neighbourgood mosque when the game was on. i told him even those few people could problyy be the hardcore supporters of some team praying for victory.
   
   
4. too much female skin. there are the football fan chicks and cheerleading gals - flashing once in a while. yeah, this is the only time you get to see a naked boob on maldivian national television. and therez the waka waka song. it is straight from hell. what moves. what the shakira! masha allah! i mean, naoozbillah.
   
   
5. people waste a lot of money buying TVs,sound systems (to 'listen' to worldcup yeah), setting up screens, decorating rooms,buying airtel dish (which is also haraam for showing christian channels),buying a lot of food,buying calendars, books,stickers...etc. such waste of money are always haraam.
   
   
6. media and some local companies have started betting on these games in the name of sms lucky draw quiz. more haraam activities.
   
   
7. people stay late to watch football. its a cause for being late for work, and sometimes causes you to miss dhamunamaadhu and fajr prayer. and staying up late for such an evil activity and missing prayers because of that is totally unacceptable. it is leading you astray. haraam again.
   
   
8. mixing of men and women at the football stadium and places (public screens and even rooms) where people watch the matches. we can hear women laughing and screaming too.calling out names of football players. astaghfirullah.
   
   
9. the world cup is sponsored by greedy kafir capitalist corporations who probably have connections with the freemasons and all. you are helping them. boycott worldcup and boycott cocacola too.
   
   
10. it does not follow the saudi fatwa on rules for halal football.

being a mere mortal this is the best i could do. i sincerely hope that Adhaalath Party would forgive any mistakes i might have made here. Adhaalath Party knows best.

a threat to yourself and national security could be in your head.

Not a huge threat, humanitarian efforts are always kool.

These days everyone is talking about the gitmo prisoners they are gonna bring here. innocent. are they, really? we may never know. since they werent foud guilty of a crime, theyd be innocent technically. but the word 'innocent' can be applied to any one who is not found guilty of a crime. Gayoom is also innocent, in this sense. just because someone face cruelty and injustice does not change anything about who he is. we have very good examples of this here in Maldives. chances are extremely high that these people are extremists and potential terrorists waiting to be activated (as the opposition DRP supporters claim). But im not opposing this. Coz even if this is the case, we need not fear for an extreme idea that might be imported with these people. because there wont be any extreme ideas that aint already here. we have all sorts of wahhabis and jihadis and trained terrorists here; its already here and there is nothing more to import. and i kinda accept that humanitarian angle.

helping innocent muslim brothers

So, they were treated unjustly by the USA....and this brings me to the main point i want to make here. THAT seems to be the focus of most maldivians. the other night on some FM channel there was a vox pop segment on this issue. almost everyone who supported (and most people supported this) gave "because they are innocent muslim brothers" as reason for bringing them here. Now, why do we feel like this? why these sympathetic opinions and emotional attitude? why do we feel that there is an obligation to bring them here?

Victim mentality and the conspiracy theories/paranoia about the imaginary muslims-VS-kuffar war

During the 30 years of darkness, people were continuously brainwashed with certain ideas. through the education system, through sermons and lecture, through word of mouth and most importantly through MEDIA! among these was the idea that 'there is and will always be a war between muslims and non-muslims. non-muslims are always trying to hurt muslims because they hate muslims'. Israel is the key example, with the media going on and on about it. They still describe suicide bombers as 'a martyr who sacrificed his/her life'. and then there is all the conspiracy theory stuff like jews controlling the whole world, jews are behind sept 11 attacks (i remember a series of articles on this published on Dharuma magazine). i dont support the israeli actions either, i believe palestinians are suffering there. and i hate it! but the sufferings of palestinians is being used as a tool to brainwash people. in the end, with the belief that since palestinians are suffering, we are also suffering...and understanding that america/israel is behind it...we start hating them. then we start hating jews and kafirs in general. now add a little fundie knowledge, you will get one angry 'muslim brother' clenching his finger, jumping in a fit of rage screaming; throw the kafir down the well...then we have a big party...in reality, the middle east conflict is not merely a religious conflict. it is not in black and white as a common maldivian would assume. most people dont know that there are secular movements working for the liberation of palestine, infact the only palestinian that i know personally is an Agnostic. but he loves his nation and is a political activist for the cause.

age-old blame game

...going back to the brainwashing; now people feel like being victims of the kafir people. we have an enemy to blame for our socio economic problems. Muslims, are weak and poor coz of the Kafir nations! The civil war among the early muslims (which led to the sunni/shiah divide) is also blamed on Abdullah Ibn Sabah ( a JEW!) This has continued through out history, and antisemitic conspiracy theories are supported by religious shiekhs and common people as well.

From Bosnia to Iraq

theyve seen the Bosnia war (and tried to donate some money even). Theyve seen the Iraq war and how American occupation hurt the people. A lot of maldivians openly supported Saddam Hussein, because for them he is the Hero who stand up against the "Kafir Forces". They dont hear about the atrocities he commit against "our muslim brothers and sisters". The famousAuguraana Singer (a type of music with bollywood music and dhivehi lyrics with a lot of profanity, hate speech and mockery) Haaburi dedicated a whole album praising Saddam. This tape was played on Boats, Market Place, and in Islands around the country. One song goes like ..."Saddam Varuge Shahsiyyatheh Dhuniyeyga Nethey Thiyakurahvaa Hiyvaru Fulhah Saabas Dhemey.." Here he is adressing Saddam in the highest and aristocratic level of formality and politeness from the three degrees of politeness found in Dhivehi language. saying that there is no better character than Saddam in this world, and applauding him for his courage!!

Double Standards

With this mentality, anyone who become a victim of non-muslim 'enemies'...are noticed, and maldivians feel sympathetic towards them, even tries to give any form of humanitarian aid they could. and this is a good thing. But it is only these people, people like palestinians and prisoners in gitmo that are considered muslim brothers and sisters who need our help.I have noticed how they try to mix up being arabs and being muslims.

what about the african muslims suffering coz of poverty, civilwar and ethnic conflicts. The Islamic Ministry iof Maldives is of the view that Haitian muslims werent good enough (or should i say haabee enough?), and that is the reason for the 2010 quake. They did not send money like in case of Bosnia, or Palestine...but rather mocked these 'muslim brothers and sisters'. The Sri Lankan civilwar did not get much media attention or attention of those who help "muslim brothers and sisters" despite the country being our closest neighbor.

they dont usually notice the conflicts between two muslims groups and the victims of these violence. sometimes they even fail to notice conflicts because the enemy is not one of the "major kafir nation" (which would be America, Israel, Europe and Australia) . This brings me to the point...what about the chinese people! they make all the stuff...uh, i think i will keep this for another post.too big.

Bangaalhee Brothers and Sisters

Now, for the reason why i actually started typing this post! i discovered THIS (via Phenol). a facebook group against 'bangaalhee people' (mostly-southasian, expatriate workers). they created a hate-group against bangaalhees, even when many of them are "muslim brothers and sisters". Bangaalhees are treated like subhumans, like shit! ive seen a lot of that. yet another sad reality in maldives. and from a human rights perspective, NOTHING is being done about this. we dont hear this very often in the Media, not from the ministries, not from HRCM, not from islamic groups and parties. so much for 'humanitarian efforts' and 'helping muslim brothers and sisters'.

The Human Rights Nation

i say the "helping out innocent muslims brothers and sisters" argument for bring the Gitmo guys to maldives is just bull! Anni is just taking advantage of the Maldivian people's "united victimized brotherhood" button. Hez a smart guy, someone i really do respect him. i also think he is a capable person. i really dont care what his motives are, as long as it does not hurt us, and as long as he would just quit being such a hypocrite!

Ehh..Whats up, Doc!?

It looks like he really dont want to talk about this anymore. but some people believe hez got his own agenda (sell his mandela/captnplanet image and grab a prize of some sort) behind this, others say he is just trying to sell the image of a green/humanrightish nation, just as the foreign minister planned before they came to power.Environment....yeah maybe. Human Rights? im not sure. or maybe Anni genuinely cares about non-maldivians coz he is the GLOBAL president. he cracked another joke like this even before...it was that bit about BURMESE journalists seeking asylum in maldives. yeah, this is the paradise of freedom! everyone come here puhlleeezzz! coz this is one hell of a paradise.

...no seriously, i have no idea what hez really up to. at one point i thought this must be his new hobby. collecting terrorists and people accused (falsely or otherwise) of being terrorists....the taliban talks,gitmo guys, shahid,9 fundies from pakistan, sultan park bomb guys, gangsta terrorists, sagarey...etc. BUT>>>the optimist inside me is thinking; well, maybe he wants to take giant international steps so that the people and government will follow it at a local level.

[Note: i fell asleep while writing this post last night. and today i discovered atleast one of the Gitmo guys is a PALESTINIAN! Nice move there Anni. Well played.Well done!]

Whatever

i dont think this is of any importance to us at the moment. but i also think it is not such a big deal, whatever. I am more worried about the victim mentality, us against them hate, and double standards in helping our "muslim brothers and sisters".

so finally im done with this. actually i have a lot more to say, but this is getting too long. but before i finish...

A summary for morons and tl;drians : what i did not say, and what i wanted to say.

>i am not spreading atheism or laadheenee (whatever the frack that is!)

>i am not the pope (well i am, but not the guy in Vatican atleast)

>i am not hating islam or muslims

>i am a muslim (100%)

>i dont support any specific party

>>i am NOT against bringin the gitmo guys here

>>i have a problem with the kind of reasoning most people who support bringing em have.

>>ive explained the problem i have (victim mentality blah blah)

>>i find discrimination against bangaalhees disturbing and contradicting the arguments in favor of bring the gitmo prisoners.

>>i have no idea what anni is up to, but ive attempted to find a reason

>>views expressed here should not be taken seriously

___END___

Maldives' Ministry of Islamic Affairs' comments on 2010 Haiti Earthquake.

source: www.islamicaffairs.gov.mv

TRANSLATION:

Are there any Muslims in Haiti? Do we have to gain wisdom from this [disaster]?

Haiti is a caribbean island nation, located not far from America. A certain number of Muslims live there. It is reported that they are not good people. There is no doubt about this; such earth quakes are moral lessons for everyone. Such [disasters]are caused by God because of the actions of mankind.

Estimated no.of people identified as; Dead: 230,000. Injured: 300,000, Homeless: 1,000,000

And this is what Maldives' Ministry of Islamic Affairs (MoIA) lead by the 'moderate' sheikh shaheem (trimmed beard, shirt tucked in...verily he must be a moderate) haz to say about it.